make you feel proud

On Monday my all-time favorite professor, Dennis, told me he was proud of me for taking the time and initiative to go back to school. He was very much part of my decision to leave in the first place. He encouraged me to use my gifts in the way that I am able to now. I got a lot of love and respect for him, so when he took genuine interest in my current situation, listened to the sort of struggles that I'm dealing with currently, and then said that he was proud of me, I had to hold back tears. THEN- THEN- he offered to be my senior LA advisor… which is a huge deal. He probably will have 20-30 applicants, he can take only 2 every 2 years… and he wants me to take one of those spots- without applying. Awesome.
There are few phrases that hold more meaning to me than “I’m proud of you”. Some people hold “I love you” up there… I really don’t. Our society over uses the word love so much that it no longer has real meaning… or, at least not a universal meaning. What “love” means between two people is much different than what “love” means to me and my deep affection of the MN Twins.
But “proud”, that has a universally understood meaning. When I tell someone I’m proud of them it means that I would brag about them to everyone and that every ounce of my leaps for joy as they accomplish what they set out to do. I don’t throw that phrase around at all. I don’t mess around with telling people that I’m proud of them if I'm not. If you hear it from me, it’s because I absolutely am beaming with pride with you and for you. I've been so blessed to have SO MANY people- kids, helpers, peers that are so amazingly talented and so giving... they just make me proud. SUPER proud- and I honestly talk them up to everyone. I treat their success as if it's my own, and I honestly exude delight when I speak of them. I hope I take the opportunity to tell all the wonderful people in my life how truly proud of them I really am, and they would always know that I am so pleased for them and with them.
I don’t know why it is, but when someone tells me that they’re proud of something I’ve done… it always gets me a bit misty eyed. I’m sure there’s some unresolved childhood issue there somewhere, but regardless, if someone I look up to tells me they’re proud, it puts a couple extra bounces in my step. The fact is, I know that I've done alot of things... way more than I'd ever admit... that have made me not proud, let alone the people I love and respect. I try not to do many things in order to gain recognition. I just do what it takes to get the job done. I don't really depend on other's thoughts too much- at least I try not too... Truth be told, being in the ministry, you learn that no news is good news. Typically if your inbox is empty and your voicemail is at zero, than you’re doing OK. People don’t usually go out of their way to tell you the good things you do, but you bet your bottom dollar you’ll hear about it when you slip up or make a mistake. Its not a bad thing, per say, its just the way things work… This whole school thing has been a large detraction from my job, as you can imagine, so I haven’t really heard many positive things about it from the people I interact with daily. It’s been treated (chiefly by me) as a necessary inconvenience… so for Dennis to understand that but tell me he was proud of me… that’s sweet as candy.
So thanks, Dennis! Your words boosted me like none other and your genuine concern and care… it means a whole heck of a lot!

Nichole Nordeman’s “Legacy” comes to mind… I’m not a huge fan of the song, but it fits:
I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...