a tad moody...

So I've been wrastlin' with this idea for a while, and it's not quite fully developed yet, but I figured I'd get the rough draft out in hope of re-visiting it someday...
A couple of weeks ago I had a Facebook friend (we'll call her Jane) say something to the effect of "I really need some pizza, that'll hit the spot"  and someone (we'll call her Barb) commented, "you go, Jane!  I'm praying it hits the spot."  Really Barb?  Really?  You're telling me you stopped what you were doing and said, "Dear God please let Jane's belly be filled with pizza and just let that spot of which she refers be hit.  A-men."  Really?  did you?  Methinks you didn't.  And if you did... why?
Then I'm at the night club that I work at and they have a prayer before the concert and the pastor (we'll call her Nancy) says something like, "I speak a spirit of good music into tonight and I drive out the devil from all the people entering the doors tonight."  What?  What does that even mean?
And then I go on Facebook and I see a guy (we'll call him Kirk)- a kid I went to grade school with- Who lives with his girlfriend, has 2 children out of wedlock with her, and is currently suing his parents because they did something to his dog a couple of years ago (?) and he was like, "keep praying for us guys, God hears them and will bless us through this tough time."  And I shake my head...
And then I read these books that say that God promises to give me a wife, all I need to do is pray and leave it in His hands and He will provide... and yet I don't see ANYTHING like that in my Bible...

I don't mean to be snotty or judgmental, its just that lately I've been really aware of this cheap grace that seems to be poisoning even conservative Christians.  The idea that prayers are like magic spells that if we say them God will make some good mojo go our way.  Or that a Christian can't say "good luck"  or "I hope..." because God is in control, so we have to say, "I'm praying..." because that shows we're Christians.  Or the idea that we're on cruise control and God is the driver and we just kick back and enjoy the good times while God takes us on the Christian fun time ride...
icky, people!  ICKY!
I have taken a very academic approach to my faith lately, which is new for me, and yet totally awesome.  What it does tho, is it takes that  empty or flighty emotionalism and it puts it on the waaay back burner.  In a way, I'm just not sure what role prayer has in our everyday lives... Not that I think God is in any way oblivious or apathetic- not at all- but at the same time are we called to pray that our friend is satisfied with her pizza?  I don't want to say God has better things to do... but... I mean, come on...  And yet, we're told to "pray unceasingly"  and "in all things, pray"... and I just don't know what is right and what is cheapening the amazing grace we have through Jesus.  I guess what it is is more and more I feel like we're treating prayer as a means of grace- that is, we hold prayer up right along with His Word and Sacraments as a way that grace (God's undeserved love) is imparted upon us.
This is just not true.
Prayer is a heart to heart conversation with God in which we thank Him for his bountiful goodness, ask Him for his continued grace and mercy on us lowly sinners, and confess even our darkest of sins so that when we receive the Sacrament- when we hold in our hands the body of our Savior and taste on our lips His redeeming blood- we would have no doubt that our sins are removed, our faith is all the more bolstered, and we have no question that Heaven is our home.  That is what being a Christian, nay, a Lutheran is all about.  Not this frivolity fluffy flax that does nothing but muddles Jesus' work on the cross and mixes it with our own good vibrations and burning bosoms.
Please don't misread me.  I'm all about the emotional side of the Christian life- My faith is more than a knowledge, it is a conviction that I will go to the grave defending, but I pray it isn't cheap.  It was costly; it took the life of Jesus-- God-made-man-- to steal me away from the grip of sin, death, and the Devil.  Woe to me (yes, I just said "woe to me") if I make that sacrifice into something that is dependent on my limited reason and oft manipulated emotions. 
So Jane, I hope that pizza was good, Barb, you need to spend less time on Facebook... for real.  Nancy, you can't speak jack into anything, leave that to God, also know your role and repent.
Kirk... figure it out man.  I WILL pray for you... that your conscience convicts you and you turn to the cross.
and relationship books, stop making promises that aren't true.  Crimeiny! The only advice you need give a dude looking for a gal is man up and ask her out.  Confidence is sexy.  Write that down.
I realize I'm coming off waaaaaay harsh tonight.  I don't mean to, but dang it, these things really gnaw on my gizzard, ya know?  Pray for me- that I would have patience and love and a propensity to show grace, not give guff.