Storyline

So what of it?  As the great Steve Miller once said: time keeps on slipping into the future.  This truth is just so frustrating sometimes.  I don't want to say that the existential questions of life plague me- that would be far too harsh a word- but they do give me reason to pause.  often.  It is such a fine and blurry line between contentment and gratitude, and ambition and desire.  What in life should I be fine with as-is, and what should I relentlessly pursue to change?  This answer would be so wonderful to have. 
The world turns. I sputter as I ponder whilst folks that make me glad dance together away.  The ones I care to impact for good are the ones that will never notice, not as I would have them, at least.  It is pouring water into a hole-bottomed glass.  Unfulfilling.  Frustrating.  The world turns.
I have recently come to grips with the cold, hard reality that there are things - valuable, non-replaceable things -  in my life that I have have caused to break and splinter.  Some intentionally, most not.  And there is nothing that I can do to fix those dear, dear things.  No amount of talking or compromise or desire can make them new-in-box.  The saying, "time heals all wounds" is indeed patently false in this regard.  So the obvious answer is to learn from said brokenness and carry on, but wow, that is easier said.  There is part of me in each and every one of those fragments, how can one who is not whole carry on?  What does he carry?  To where does he carry it?   such sadness.  such sorrow.  The world turns.

Lord, take me from Lamentations 5:15 to Psalm 30:11.  The world turns.