I uploaded a bunch of photos from the past decade to Facebook today. It was a blast to go through all the old pics. It wasn't too long ago that I couldn't go through them without crying... at least on the inside. There are a lot of memories in those old shoe boxes; lots of great times with some really, really good people. Of all the wild and crazy experiences I've had in my life, my summer at YNP was by far the best. If I could go back in time and relive any of my past, it would be that summer. over and over again. I tagged all the old crew and I realized- of the 15 or so that are in the pictures, all but one of us are single. Is that weird? We were certainly all of the same ilk, perhaps we're all still to adventurous to get "tied down"... OR the ladies can't get over me... haha
good times.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
Televisiony
I respect those who have no emotional attachment to television, but I am fully enmeshed with the ole boobtube.
For instance, right now I'm watching Cheers. I have been watching Cheers since I was like 10 years old. Certainly I didn't really understand it as a lad, but during high school it was on before Leno and I'd watch it almost every night. I have to believe I've seen every episode. Just like I've seen every MASH (It was on from 5-6 on weekdays when I was in high school) and every episode of Star Trek: the Next Generation because it was on at 9 when I was in high school... man, I wonder why my high school grades weren't better..
I also have a strong affinity for Hogan's Hero's and the Andy Griffith Show because I would watch them every day before I went to work at the milk factory back in the day.
My roommate and I watched Matlock together the other day. Of all the ridiculous shows that my mom LOVES to watch, Matlock is the one I can tolerate. I've watched countless episodes with her over the years. My dad is a big old time TV fan- the Waltons and Bonanza are a couple of his favorites, I never go into them, however. Old school Nick at Night was good stuff- Patty Duke, My Three Sons, Mr. Ed, and Green Acres... ahhh memories. I don't know if its good or not that some of the most vivid family memories I have are when we're sitting around watching TV- that one invention completely changed the world... nutty.
Needless to say, they don't make shows like they used to. I like According to Jim as a sit com- it was still good for the whole family- but is any show currently on prime-time even remotely family oriented? I can't think of any. Even shows on Disney and Nickelodeon are sometimes a bit risque... its really unfortunate. I suppose at some point in my life I'll have to decide whether or not my family will be TV watchers... of course by that time every single show ever made will be on BluRay or available for instant download. Maybe my kids will be the ones to keep Magnum PI and Gomer Pyle, USMC alive. now THAT's a life purpose!
For instance, right now I'm watching Cheers. I have been watching Cheers since I was like 10 years old. Certainly I didn't really understand it as a lad, but during high school it was on before Leno and I'd watch it almost every night. I have to believe I've seen every episode. Just like I've seen every MASH (It was on from 5-6 on weekdays when I was in high school) and every episode of Star Trek: the Next Generation because it was on at 9 when I was in high school... man, I wonder why my high school grades weren't better..
I also have a strong affinity for Hogan's Hero's and the Andy Griffith Show because I would watch them every day before I went to work at the milk factory back in the day.
My roommate and I watched Matlock together the other day. Of all the ridiculous shows that my mom LOVES to watch, Matlock is the one I can tolerate. I've watched countless episodes with her over the years. My dad is a big old time TV fan- the Waltons and Bonanza are a couple of his favorites, I never go into them, however. Old school Nick at Night was good stuff- Patty Duke, My Three Sons, Mr. Ed, and Green Acres... ahhh memories. I don't know if its good or not that some of the most vivid family memories I have are when we're sitting around watching TV- that one invention completely changed the world... nutty.
Needless to say, they don't make shows like they used to. I like According to Jim as a sit com- it was still good for the whole family- but is any show currently on prime-time even remotely family oriented? I can't think of any. Even shows on Disney and Nickelodeon are sometimes a bit risque... its really unfortunate. I suppose at some point in my life I'll have to decide whether or not my family will be TV watchers... of course by that time every single show ever made will be on BluRay or available for instant download. Maybe my kids will be the ones to keep Magnum PI and Gomer Pyle, USMC alive. now THAT's a life purpose!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
pontification
Sigh.
I know the last thing you want to do is read me complain, but man oh man my "to do" list is never ending...
The worst part about that is I don't have time to pontificate... I might be a very odd duck... well, I AM an odd duck, but this could make me even odder in that I often lose myself in my own head. I guess you'd call it daydreaming, but its more than that. I have complete conversations or long orations in my head. This leads to interesting bla(h)g posts... sometimes... but nowadays when I try to get into a train of thought a little whisper in the back of my head goes off and reminds me of something I've forgotten or neglected to do. Its like waking up from a dream in the middle of the night, so once I process that reminder the train of thought that I had is gone.
I hope none of this makes me sound too nuts-o... haha... Its just how I think...
Needless to say, I'm weary.
OK that's enough psychobabble complaining. I'm of the opinion that you have time for what you want to have time for, that is, you accomplish what you make a priority. I need to make this a priority because I've come far too close to let just stop.
In fact, I've been thinking about how my priorities will indeed get to change come December 17th. No longer will it be about my long commute and finishing homework. I will be able to invest more time in the lives of kids and giving church the attention it needs. That'll be nice.
Wellp, until then...
I know the last thing you want to do is read me complain, but man oh man my "to do" list is never ending...
The worst part about that is I don't have time to pontificate... I might be a very odd duck... well, I AM an odd duck, but this could make me even odder in that I often lose myself in my own head. I guess you'd call it daydreaming, but its more than that. I have complete conversations or long orations in my head. This leads to interesting bla(h)g posts... sometimes... but nowadays when I try to get into a train of thought a little whisper in the back of my head goes off and reminds me of something I've forgotten or neglected to do. Its like waking up from a dream in the middle of the night, so once I process that reminder the train of thought that I had is gone.
I hope none of this makes me sound too nuts-o... haha... Its just how I think...
Needless to say, I'm weary.
OK that's enough psychobabble complaining. I'm of the opinion that you have time for what you want to have time for, that is, you accomplish what you make a priority. I need to make this a priority because I've come far too close to let just stop.
In fact, I've been thinking about how my priorities will indeed get to change come December 17th. No longer will it be about my long commute and finishing homework. I will be able to invest more time in the lives of kids and giving church the attention it needs. That'll be nice.
Wellp, until then...
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
blah
ugh I have a really nervous stomach right now, and I really don't know why... Blah!!!!
I hope it subsides soon, however- I gots stuff to do, yo!
BUT, check this- assuming I can get all my finals moved to the same day, I only have 18 more days of school left! WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
that's pretty cool.
Off to a meeting, hope I don't get blown away!
I hope it subsides soon, however- I gots stuff to do, yo!
BUT, check this- assuming I can get all my finals moved to the same day, I only have 18 more days of school left! WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
that's pretty cool.
Off to a meeting, hope I don't get blown away!
Monday, October 25, 2010
learn
Hmm... This started out as an idea for something much different...
alas, this is what it became, so there ya have it, I guess... It could be more... it could be better, but it's all I got right now... maybe someday I'll revisit it.
After five plus years of being in the youth worker game, I have come to the conclusion that the key to youth ministry is the desire to learn. When you break it down, learning is what it is all about.
You have to be willing to learn about the teenage brain and how they think. To know who GaGa, Gandolf, Gryffindor, and Garret Gilbert are because they matter to your students. You have to learn how to listen and when to talk, how to not act shocked when you hear of the details of some kid’s lives, and how to convey emotion over Facebook chat. You have to learn how to be (or at least seem) interested in stories that really don’t make sense.
You have to learn how to let kids beat you in basketball, teach you things you already know, and the Heimlich in case of a game of Chubby Bunny gone bad. You have to know all the “Q” words that don’t require a “u” in Scrabble, and who has texting on their phones and who doesn't. You have to know what it means when Master Chief is in his cryo-tube and when the ACOG scope for the FAMAS gets unlocked in your third prestige. You have to be able to cheer for 6 different high school mascots and know where 6 different auditoriums are located within a school. You have to know who is gone every other weekend because they’re at their dad’s house, and who you haven’t seen in church for a couple of weeks.
You have to learn the names of all your students, and never ever call them by their sister’s name, even though they are identical twins. You have to learn how to remember the joys amid the deep disappointments, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and always expect the unexpected.
You have to learn how to balance church life and “real life”. You have to learn how to leave your work at work. You have to know when the play performance is, the time of the choir concert, and who plays on JV and who made varsity. You also have to know who got cut, and be sure to let him know that it’ll be OK.
You have to know who is struggling and who is excelling; who needs help, and who needs space to sort things out on their own. You have to learn to not compare one kid to another, but rather appreciate each for who they are. You have to learn to not get down about who is not there, but rejoice for those who are.
You have to know how to Tweet, update, upload, post, poke, promote, and share, sometimes all at the same time. You have to know to avoid what’s so fifteen minutes ago and be aware of what’s cool today. You have to know that you are NOT 16 years old anymore and dress, speak, and style your hair accordingly.
You have to know how to say no, and when you have to say yes even though you really don’t want to. You have to know how to clean up messes (both literally and figuratively), and how to say sorry. You have to learn how to appreciate those who may never appreciate you. You have to learn how to sound smart even though you have no idea what you’re saying. You have to learn how to keep your promises and not make one unless you can.
You have to be willing to learn from other youth workers and realize you’re not on an island. You have to learn how to meet students where they’re at and not expect immediate change. You have to learn how to be the adult even if you feel like one of the kids. You have to learn that confusion doesn’t mean indifference and busyness doesn’t mean progress. You have to learn how to schedule the unscheduled time, and how to be flexible. You have to learn how to delegate, lest your passion fizzles and dies.
You have to learn how to read between the lines and how to say the same thing five different ways. You have to learn how to fill your own cup. You have to know where the Bible says an ass talked to Baalam, and what anthropomorphism means. You have to know how to answer the phone at 3am and how to react to the sobbing brokenhearted. You have to learn that you don’t know everything and you learn twice as much from your students than they do from you. You have to know who your Savior is so that you might be able to share Him when a kid needs it. You have to know what grace is and be willing to show it even when it’s difficult.
But the thing about all these things, and I could go on for another couple of pages, but the thing about these things is we youth people love it! We get to rock out to pop music and listen to kids talk about their days. We get to play Call of Duty and get our butts kicked by kids 1/3 our age. We get to cheer for every sport we never played and paint our faces just to make our one student feel loved. We get to help kids figure stuff out and be with them when they tell their parents about the trouble they got into.
We get to answer the calls at 3am and spend way too much time on Facebook. We get to have inside jokes with teenagers and buy silly gag gifts just because it’ll make them smile. We get to learn from other people who do the same thing we do, and we get to share ideas. We get to grow deeper in our faith so that we might be able to help kids who struggle in theirs. We get to learn about Jesus and see Him work in the lives of the next generation. None of those things are a "have to", they are all "get to"'s and that is what makes youth ministry so great!
Learning is what it is all about- and the willingness to learn is what keeps us going day after day. Today I can learn something about someone that I never knew before. And maybe, just maybe I can tell them something about their Lord and Savior they never knew before. That’s what this is all about.
I am blessed.
alas, this is what it became, so there ya have it, I guess... It could be more... it could be better, but it's all I got right now... maybe someday I'll revisit it.
After five plus years of being in the youth worker game, I have come to the conclusion that the key to youth ministry is the desire to learn. When you break it down, learning is what it is all about.
You have to be willing to learn about the teenage brain and how they think. To know who GaGa, Gandolf, Gryffindor, and Garret Gilbert are because they matter to your students. You have to learn how to listen and when to talk, how to not act shocked when you hear of the details of some kid’s lives, and how to convey emotion over Facebook chat. You have to learn how to be (or at least seem) interested in stories that really don’t make sense.
You have to learn how to let kids beat you in basketball, teach you things you already know, and the Heimlich in case of a game of Chubby Bunny gone bad. You have to know all the “Q” words that don’t require a “u” in Scrabble, and who has texting on their phones and who doesn't. You have to know what it means when Master Chief is in his cryo-tube and when the ACOG scope for the FAMAS gets unlocked in your third prestige. You have to be able to cheer for 6 different high school mascots and know where 6 different auditoriums are located within a school. You have to know who is gone every other weekend because they’re at their dad’s house, and who you haven’t seen in church for a couple of weeks.
You have to learn the names of all your students, and never ever call them by their sister’s name, even though they are identical twins. You have to learn how to remember the joys amid the deep disappointments, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and always expect the unexpected.
You have to learn how to balance church life and “real life”. You have to learn how to leave your work at work. You have to know when the play performance is, the time of the choir concert, and who plays on JV and who made varsity. You also have to know who got cut, and be sure to let him know that it’ll be OK.
You have to know who is struggling and who is excelling; who needs help, and who needs space to sort things out on their own. You have to learn to not compare one kid to another, but rather appreciate each for who they are. You have to learn to not get down about who is not there, but rejoice for those who are.
You have to know how to Tweet, update, upload, post, poke, promote, and share, sometimes all at the same time. You have to know to avoid what’s so fifteen minutes ago and be aware of what’s cool today. You have to know that you are NOT 16 years old anymore and dress, speak, and style your hair accordingly.
You have to know how to say no, and when you have to say yes even though you really don’t want to. You have to know how to clean up messes (both literally and figuratively), and how to say sorry. You have to learn how to appreciate those who may never appreciate you. You have to learn how to sound smart even though you have no idea what you’re saying. You have to learn how to keep your promises and not make one unless you can.
You have to be willing to learn from other youth workers and realize you’re not on an island. You have to learn how to meet students where they’re at and not expect immediate change. You have to learn how to be the adult even if you feel like one of the kids. You have to learn that confusion doesn’t mean indifference and busyness doesn’t mean progress. You have to learn how to schedule the unscheduled time, and how to be flexible. You have to learn how to delegate, lest your passion fizzles and dies.
You have to learn how to read between the lines and how to say the same thing five different ways. You have to learn how to fill your own cup. You have to know where the Bible says an ass talked to Baalam, and what anthropomorphism means. You have to know how to answer the phone at 3am and how to react to the sobbing brokenhearted. You have to learn that you don’t know everything and you learn twice as much from your students than they do from you. You have to know who your Savior is so that you might be able to share Him when a kid needs it. You have to know what grace is and be willing to show it even when it’s difficult.
But the thing about all these things, and I could go on for another couple of pages, but the thing about these things is we youth people love it! We get to rock out to pop music and listen to kids talk about their days. We get to play Call of Duty and get our butts kicked by kids 1/3 our age. We get to cheer for every sport we never played and paint our faces just to make our one student feel loved. We get to help kids figure stuff out and be with them when they tell their parents about the trouble they got into.
We get to answer the calls at 3am and spend way too much time on Facebook. We get to have inside jokes with teenagers and buy silly gag gifts just because it’ll make them smile. We get to learn from other people who do the same thing we do, and we get to share ideas. We get to grow deeper in our faith so that we might be able to help kids who struggle in theirs. We get to learn about Jesus and see Him work in the lives of the next generation. None of those things are a "have to", they are all "get to"'s and that is what makes youth ministry so great!
Learning is what it is all about- and the willingness to learn is what keeps us going day after day. Today I can learn something about someone that I never knew before. And maybe, just maybe I can tell them something about their Lord and Savior they never knew before. That’s what this is all about.
I am blessed.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Better things to come
Ok ok so I haven't been too johnny on the spot with this whole self-motivated bla(g)h thing... But I will this week. I have to stop the spinning out of control chaos that is my current academic life and get on to a routine... Starting tomorrow... :)
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Sunday, October 17, 2010
Like BBQ, pancakes, fire pits, and apple crisp.
Its an amazing thing to know you're loved, appreciated, and needed. All warm fuzzy on the inside... Great is the Lord and worthy of praise! His mercy no one can fathom.
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Thursday, October 14, 2010
help?
there is too much to do!!!!!!!!!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ok that felt good.
OH- also- I'm growing a mustache. I'm a week into it, and I've committed to give it a month. I expect to look like Tom Sellick by November 10th. People respect the mustache...
OK,
back to work.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ok that felt good.
OH- also- I'm growing a mustache. I'm a week into it, and I've committed to give it a month. I expect to look like Tom Sellick by November 10th. People respect the mustache...
OK,
back to work.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
10-13, good buddy
well shoot.
Its a long story, but I kind of suggested I'd start a blog about my little 100 mile challenge thing, thinking that I would be told not to... but they called my bluff, so I need to start another blog. all about my foot and fitness. that'll be a fascinating read, let me tell you.
It's all for my independent study phy ed class, so it's all in the name of education.
Needless to say, I'll not be sharing that link with anyone. :)
So I just added a little more work for me...
oiy.
IN BETTER NEWS, today is officially the HALF WAY POINT of this semester. holy moly, starting tomorrow the ending is beginning! this... this is exceedingly good, people!
i will now go to bed nice and early.
For you listening pleasure, my latest obsession.
"colder weather" by the Zac Brown Band. I know you're all wating with eager anticipation for my top 9 albums of 2010. You can bet your bottom dollar this album is on that list, I can't stop listening to it!
enjoy.
Its a long story, but I kind of suggested I'd start a blog about my little 100 mile challenge thing, thinking that I would be told not to... but they called my bluff, so I need to start another blog. all about my foot and fitness. that'll be a fascinating read, let me tell you.
It's all for my independent study phy ed class, so it's all in the name of education.
Needless to say, I'll not be sharing that link with anyone. :)
So I just added a little more work for me...
oiy.
IN BETTER NEWS, today is officially the HALF WAY POINT of this semester. holy moly, starting tomorrow the ending is beginning! this... this is exceedingly good, people!
i will now go to bed nice and early.
For you listening pleasure, my latest obsession.
"colder weather" by the Zac Brown Band. I know you're all wating with eager anticipation for my top 9 albums of 2010. You can bet your bottom dollar this album is on that list, I can't stop listening to it!
enjoy.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
pay it forward
Today I had to fill out a personality profile thing. You know the type- you answer questions about yourself and then it tells you what kind of a person you are, or what kind of person you're compatible with... that kind of thing.
One of the questions was, "Is it sometimes difficult for you to perform acts of kindness?" I thought that was an odd question, and yet I had to put yes. I mean I like to think of myself as a kind person, and I really really try to go the extra mile, but it is sometimes difficult for me to be kind to people. Whether its because I'm tired or cranky or because the person annoys me or has little to nothing to offer me in return, whatever the reason I sometimes treat kindness as a chore. Ugh that's just gross to articulate.
Its not like a conscious decision to not treat someone with kindness, or with less kindness than I would with other people. but after the fact if you really dissect the situation, I could have been nicer or could have done more, but didn't because of my own selfishness. That's what it comes down to: I'm too selfish to be concerned with your needs. no good.
In response to this disgusting realization, I am re-reading Max Lucado's Its Not About Me. It is a really well-written book that really gets to the heart of the issue that God is central in my life, and I get to reflect Him and His love in my actions, thoughts, and words. It's not about me. It's about the Savior inside of me, and it's about loving others around me... even if it makes me nervous, uncomfortable, or inconvenienced.
These are lofty words, I know. I can talk about going and loving the "unlovable" all I want, but it amounts to little more than trivial lip-service. The fact is, I unlove so many people every day, I don't have to change a single step of my routine and find opportunities to put others in front of me around every corner.
I think my biggest malfunction in this regard is expecting payment for my kindness. Not monetarily, but rather in relational currency. Something like I call you on your birthday, you'd better call me on mine... that kind of idea. I really need to work on that. Why am I giving you my time? Because Jesus gave us His life. It sounds so hokey and so cheesy, but man it's true. 1 John 4 tells us that we love because He first loved us. I don't think that it's a misuse of that verse to say we love others because He first loved us. Indeed, we wouldn't know what selflessness is if it wasn't first shown to us time and time again by our Redeemer.
If you haven't read Lucado's Its Not About Me, I cannot recommend it enough. It will take you 2 hours to finish, and it really brings the focus of our daily lives back where it needs to be: on Jesus.
If I may quote Lucado:
May God grant me the maturity to always keep that in mind when I find kindness to be a chore...
One of the questions was, "Is it sometimes difficult for you to perform acts of kindness?" I thought that was an odd question, and yet I had to put yes. I mean I like to think of myself as a kind person, and I really really try to go the extra mile, but it is sometimes difficult for me to be kind to people. Whether its because I'm tired or cranky or because the person annoys me or has little to nothing to offer me in return, whatever the reason I sometimes treat kindness as a chore. Ugh that's just gross to articulate.
Its not like a conscious decision to not treat someone with kindness, or with less kindness than I would with other people. but after the fact if you really dissect the situation, I could have been nicer or could have done more, but didn't because of my own selfishness. That's what it comes down to: I'm too selfish to be concerned with your needs. no good.
In response to this disgusting realization, I am re-reading Max Lucado's Its Not About Me. It is a really well-written book that really gets to the heart of the issue that God is central in my life, and I get to reflect Him and His love in my actions, thoughts, and words. It's not about me. It's about the Savior inside of me, and it's about loving others around me... even if it makes me nervous, uncomfortable, or inconvenienced.
These are lofty words, I know. I can talk about going and loving the "unlovable" all I want, but it amounts to little more than trivial lip-service. The fact is, I unlove so many people every day, I don't have to change a single step of my routine and find opportunities to put others in front of me around every corner.
I think my biggest malfunction in this regard is expecting payment for my kindness. Not monetarily, but rather in relational currency. Something like I call you on your birthday, you'd better call me on mine... that kind of idea. I really need to work on that. Why am I giving you my time? Because Jesus gave us His life. It sounds so hokey and so cheesy, but man it's true. 1 John 4 tells us that we love because He first loved us. I don't think that it's a misuse of that verse to say we love others because He first loved us. Indeed, we wouldn't know what selflessness is if it wasn't first shown to us time and time again by our Redeemer.
If you haven't read Lucado's Its Not About Me, I cannot recommend it enough. It will take you 2 hours to finish, and it really brings the focus of our daily lives back where it needs to be: on Jesus.
If I may quote Lucado:
The last breath you took as you read that last sentence was given to you for one reason, that you might for another moment "reflect the Lord's glory" (2 Cor. 3:18). God awoke you and me this morning for one purpose: "Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples" (1 Chron. 16:24).
"God made all things, and everything continues through him and for him. To him be the glory forever" (Romans 11:36). "There is only one God, the Father, who created everything, and we exist for him" (1 Cor. 8:6 NLT).
Why does the earth spin? For him.
Why do you have talents and abilities? For him.
Why do you have money or poverty? For him.
Strength or struggles? For him.
Everything and everyone exists to reveal his glory.
Including you.
May God grant me the maturity to always keep that in mind when I find kindness to be a chore...
Saturday, October 9, 2010
i don't want to talk about it...
*biiiiig sigh* Oh Twins... You've once again broken my heart... It's the age old question: is it really better to get to the playoffs and get swept 3 straight years or never make them at all... The debate may continue forever. I still love you, though. Go out and get an arm or two and we'll see you in February.
In other news: I'm excited for the new Gopher football coach that will be hired in December. That'll be fun.
AND Monday- #84 returns. Its gonna be a great ride!
In other news: I'm excited for the new Gopher football coach that will be hired in December. That'll be fun.
AND Monday- #84 returns. Its gonna be a great ride!
Friday, October 8, 2010
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Any dream will do
Well this can just be a bla(h)g about dreams, cuz they're coming fast and furious... Last night I dreamt that I was at a youth event and 2 kids started drinking... So I took the booze away from them and then got in their faces - like nose to nose- yelling at them about how they let their moms and grandmas down and how they were terrible people... They both started bawling and tried to apologize but I turned away and said in a very scary voice, "there is no forgiveness for you." then they ran away and the event continued...
Yep. That's all in my brain...
Oiy.
Yep. That's all in my brain...
Oiy.
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Wednesday, October 6, 2010
shoulda got callahan brakes
I've had this reoccurring dream lately. It's very vivid and I've had it pretty much every time that I've slept the past 2 weeks or so. I am in a car- sometimes a van- and it's full of my youth. We're laughing and joking and having fun on a road trip of some sort. Then the road starts to curve unexpectedly. I try to slow down but I can't. I then either careen out of control into a forest and eventually crash into a large tree or there's a brick wall at the end of the turn that I smash into.
The thing is, the accident part of it is so real. I've never been in a car accident before, but it feels like I'm in one every night. The dream goes to third person and slow motion as I go over ever bump and terror fills the eyes and faces of all the kids until SMASH! and then I wake up.
yeah.
Now I don't have no technicolor dream coat or nothin', but I think I can interpret that there dream.
I think the stress is getting to me... lots of school work and projects and deadlines and work and retreats and events and nights and functions and things and car repairs (I need new brakes, ironically) and trips and promo and kids and relationships and demands and desires and man oh man, my cup runneth over... my subconscious is warning me, but I don't know what I can do to slow down... December can't come quick enough, yo.
I'm not complaining at all, just giving some insight to my subconscious mind.
I sat for a long time today, and the twins game went waaay too long. I'm spent.
The thing is, the accident part of it is so real. I've never been in a car accident before, but it feels like I'm in one every night. The dream goes to third person and slow motion as I go over ever bump and terror fills the eyes and faces of all the kids until SMASH! and then I wake up.
yeah.
Now I don't have no technicolor dream coat or nothin', but I think I can interpret that there dream.
I think the stress is getting to me... lots of school work and projects and deadlines and work and retreats and events and nights and functions and things and car repairs (I need new brakes, ironically) and trips and promo and kids and relationships and demands and desires and man oh man, my cup runneth over... my subconscious is warning me, but I don't know what I can do to slow down... December can't come quick enough, yo.
I'm not complaining at all, just giving some insight to my subconscious mind.
I sat for a long time today, and the twins game went waaay too long. I'm spent.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
jah
i enjoy intelligent conversation. I miss it, really... I remember the days of sitting outside the guys dorm smoking cigars talking doctrine with three men who all are PhD's now. I don't think those kind of things are happening at BLC anymore, and that is sad. I know for sure it's not happening with me, and that is also sad. I can't remember the last conversation in which I was challenged. I don't mean that to sound pampas, its just my plight as a youth minister and is the same as any educator, I suppose; in that I rarely talk to people who want to listen. It's not their fault, they're kids... its what they do- not listen- but at the end of the day my forehead hurts from banging it against the die-cast steel wall that is the teenage psyche and it sometimes wares thin...
regardless, I am encouraged by our college kids and I greatly look forward to times we will spend together as a group. I hope they come to the battle of wits well armed because I'm lookin' for a battle. :)
tomorrow will be a long day, but one that hopefully will be very productive and will lead to easier weeks ahead... AND my highway is at least partially opened now. That is very good news! It's the simple things in life...
regardless, I am encouraged by our college kids and I greatly look forward to times we will spend together as a group. I hope they come to the battle of wits well armed because I'm lookin' for a battle. :)
tomorrow will be a long day, but one that hopefully will be very productive and will lead to easier weeks ahead... AND my highway is at least partially opened now. That is very good news! It's the simple things in life...
Monday, October 4, 2010
yep...
ho hum...
I have little to say today.
I know its odd for me to be that way
but all I'm doing is living amidst the fray
I want to forget about homework and just sing and play
but then I would receive no pay
I suppose I could sell Mary Kay
but that would look kinda gay
so I'll get to work and look forward to May
when I graduate from Beth-a-nay
and everyone will yell and cheer "YAY!"
yep... that just happened.
You're welcome. :)
I have little to say today.
I know its odd for me to be that way
but all I'm doing is living amidst the fray
I want to forget about homework and just sing and play
but then I would receive no pay
I suppose I could sell Mary Kay
but that would look kinda gay
so I'll get to work and look forward to May
when I graduate from Beth-a-nay
and everyone will yell and cheer "YAY!"
yep... that just happened.
You're welcome. :)
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Today:
Thankful, tired, and totally not wanting it to be Monday...
Also, overwhelmingly proud of my runners!
Also, overwhelmingly proud of my runners!
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Saturday, October 2, 2010
high amid the treetops
It is 11:00 pm and I’m in my office at church catching up on work that I was too lazy to take care of throughout the week. I don’t really mind. I suppose this is another thing to put on the list of things that will disappear if (God-forbid) I ever get married. Haha that could be an interesting list…
Anyway. Today I MC’d another night of battle of the bands… it was pretty brutal, to be honest. There are a lot of kids who think they’re pretty stellar, but are actually really, really off key. Oh well, still good times.
I’m trying to come up with something devotional in nature to write, but nothing comes to mind… I ordered 6 books written by the amazing minds of Gene Veith and J.W. Montgomery. I love Half.com, by the way. All told, the six books came to like $40 including shipping. Awesome.
The first one came and is called “Loving God with all Your Mind” by Veith. It looks pretty fantastic. I have really enjoyed apologetics lately, and I think it is something I would like to further pursue… but where? I have come to the realization that in this moment, at 11:02 on October 2, 2010 I don’t want to be a parish pastor. BUT I want the knowledge and education equal to a pastor’s… so… yeah. What that means, I don’t know, but perhaps a pursuit of an advance degree in religion or philosophy would be wise. But then the question of where to obtain said degree looms, and since there is no easy or clear answer to that I throw my hands up in the air… and wave them like I just don’t care.
Once I’m done with that, I get to studying my GRE materials. I think where I go next rests heavily on my GRE score. Wish me luck, I guess…
It is fun to have options, and God-willing, come May I’ll be all graduated and spiffy and I can actually fully explore my options. I really hope more education is in the cards, because after 11 years in college, I’ve kind of grown to appreciate knowledge and I wish to engage in the endless pursuit thereof.
Watch out academia, here I come!
…eventually.
Anyway. Today I MC’d another night of battle of the bands… it was pretty brutal, to be honest. There are a lot of kids who think they’re pretty stellar, but are actually really, really off key. Oh well, still good times.
I’m trying to come up with something devotional in nature to write, but nothing comes to mind… I ordered 6 books written by the amazing minds of Gene Veith and J.W. Montgomery. I love Half.com, by the way. All told, the six books came to like $40 including shipping. Awesome.
The first one came and is called “Loving God with all Your Mind” by Veith. It looks pretty fantastic. I have really enjoyed apologetics lately, and I think it is something I would like to further pursue… but where? I have come to the realization that in this moment, at 11:02 on October 2, 2010 I don’t want to be a parish pastor. BUT I want the knowledge and education equal to a pastor’s… so… yeah. What that means, I don’t know, but perhaps a pursuit of an advance degree in religion or philosophy would be wise. But then the question of where to obtain said degree looms, and since there is no easy or clear answer to that I throw my hands up in the air… and wave them like I just don’t care.
Once I’m done with that, I get to studying my GRE materials. I think where I go next rests heavily on my GRE score. Wish me luck, I guess…
It is fun to have options, and God-willing, come May I’ll be all graduated and spiffy and I can actually fully explore my options. I really hope more education is in the cards, because after 11 years in college, I’ve kind of grown to appreciate knowledge and I wish to engage in the endless pursuit thereof.
Watch out academia, here I come!
…eventually.
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