Friday, April 30, 2010

mr. yuck.

Few things irk me more than people who feel as if they are entitled to things that they are not. There was a large family at my high school whose patriarch was a prominent teacher at the school. All the kids felt entitled to… well… everything. As a result they lacked friends. Or the kiddos I used to work with in inner-city Chicago… I was appalled at their false sense of entitlement they had when it came to things in the church and our time and the things we would give them. There was little patience, little desire to wait or ask; just an overwhelming spirit of MINE. Icky.
I used to eat lunch with a gal who would always tell me how she could do this and do that… she would get upset when someone else was chosen for a task that she deemed herself worthy of…. But I never ever saw any fruits of her work- only big talk about her potential. I couldn’t handle too much of her. (I know that sounds really bratty- but what can I say? It’s the honest truth…)
Sadly, this is how I’ve been acting lately. There’s this silly thing that I REALLY want to do, but I haven’t been asked to do it despite my best efforts and politicking… it is so frustrating! I’m frustrated that I haven’t been asked, but more than that, I’m frustrated that I’m mad that I’m not doing it… you know? Sometimes I just get puffed up with this false entitlement and get mad at the guy they got doing it and I look at him in anger and think, “that should be ME!” gross. That’s so silly! This is completely out of my control and if I am someday asked to perform this task, it will be based on merit and genuine desire, not lobbying and manipulating…
I remember a time when I was in 8th or 9th grade and I was riding home from school with my mom in our station wagon, and we had to drop off some kids that went to our church. I was all mad because my mom NEVER took highways and back roads and stoplights were then and still are the bane of my very existence. Well this particular day I was in rare cranky form- I can picture it like it was yesterday. We were driving past a cemetery I remember and I was yelling at my mom how stupid it was she never took the highway and I just screamed, “BUY ME A CAR!” My mom just paused and looked at me and replied calmly, “Son, you’re 14. What good would a car do you?” Indeed. Impatience and false entitlement… shameful.
I guess it comes down to the fact that I have blessed to have lived a very charmed life. Quite honestly, I haven’t’ been told “no” too often, so when something comes along that I want but simply cannot have, I get frustrated. Then terrible, blinding pride takes over… and that is not an attractive quality. Galatians 5 talks of the fruits of the Spirit- love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Honestly, I think patience is the hardest one of those, and yet I think it might be one that speaks the loudest. Patience is such a rare and desirable quality, people notice when it’s displayed. There’s power in the art of waiting. Working with kids I see patience often, and I’m always in awe. We’ve been out sledding and we’re all starving- the pizza comes and the boys all mob the table taking and scratching and gouging… but there’s always 3 or 4 kids (usually female, let’s be honest…) that are just patiently waiting their turn… they know there will be plenty of food and they are in no hurry. (I hope they’re secretly judging their peers acting like Neanderthals in front of them… )
I do admire those kids, and honestly, I think of them when I find myself vying for position in a line or tapping my foot in disgust of the wait…
Patience and self-control… they go hand-in-hand, and the Lord knows I need extra rich measures of both.
Waiting is part of the Christian’s life- the Jews waited thousands of years for the promise to be fulfilled in Jesus- but when the time had fully come, God sent His Son. God’s time is not our time- It is my prayer and desire to be on “Kairos” more than I’m on “Koryros”. Kairos is loosely translated into “God’s time”… may I be focused on His timing and His desire for my life, not my short-sided and sinful longings… How fickle am I?? Seriously, of all people on earth certainly I would know that God has an awesome plan and the things I want are no where NEAR as cool as the things He has in store… I mean the job that I will have been doing for 5 years come June 1 wasn’t even a blip on my radar screen 5 years and 5 months ago… but God knew… and in “Kairos” it was made fantastically apparent to me that it was where I needed to be… As for the next chapter of my life… trust in Kairos… trust in Kairos… trust in Kairos.

Roll Your Stone

Speaking of things I want but cannot have... Mumford is coming to MPLS in May and they are SOLD OUT- like there are over 100 requests for tickets on Craigstlist right now... they are no where to be found. can't even get close to one... bummer.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

cheerio?

MAN!
i am super un-motivated...
but i just ate cheerios... and cheerios give me more energy than Red Bull... i really have no idea why, but honestly, they're like a steroid for me.
BUT i want to just go to bed- worry about this paper tomorrow... I work best under pressure- but the cheerios running through my veins tell me to stay awake...
blah.
go away school!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

KLOVE'n it!

In honor of hearing my buddy Jason on KLOVE this morning, I am going to post my favorite song of his. As far as I can tell, this is the ONLY place on the whole interwebs where these lyrics exist... nice.

The Reasons Why You Brought Me Here
By Jason Gray

I know I’d get an answer
That I won’t understand
If I ask that your intentions be made clear
I know your plans are greater
And in the greater plan
Are the reasons why you brought me here

My story would be different
If it were only mine to write
There are secrets I would never volunteer
But secrets lose their power
When they have no place to hide
Maybe that is why you brought me here

All I see are the ruins
As the smoke starts to clear
I hope you know what you’re doing
Cuz you brought me here

It’s a mess of mine own making
This I won’t deny
Though the consequences shaped my heart with fear
If I was happy with the way things were
I’d give more of a fight
I guess I’m grateful that you brought me here

All I see are the ruins
As the smoke starts to clear
I hope you know what you’re doing
Cuz you brought me here

If it’s hard to raise the white flag
It’s even harder to believe
That surrendering is worth the sacrifice
Cuz the very thing I always feared would be the death of me
Was a way to come alive

Though it hurts to be this broken
It’s bearable somehow
As the chance to prove I’m worthy disappears
I always heard you loved me
But I think I know it now
Is that the reason why you brought me here?
I guess I’m grateful that you brought me here


here's a clip of this tune... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rO8YOcYYbSI&feature=related
and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwSSV5L2eEY&feature=related

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

coasting?

hmmm... for some reason I thought that I was all set for the end of the semester... turns out I was wrong. I need to get moving- i have some big stuff due before midnight... it must have been terrible going to school before E-mail... handing stuff in in person... so old fashion. Probably drove the model T to class too, right?

OH- yeah- so I think that I need to read more of my comedic hero's writings. My favorite comedian is Steve Martin. He is genius- besides movies and killer stand-up, he’s written a bunch of books, of which I've only read one. He also has a monthly column in the New Yorker… I’ve not read a single one…
Stand ups talk about how they listened to Cosby or Carlin record so much that they wore them out... well I need to start reading more of Steve Martin's and Garrison Keillor's writings... I decided that I want to be known as a story-teller, and I think their style is what I’d like to emulate- having those kind of guys to strive for is mighty lofty, but pretty awesome...
Also, Steve Martin is an AMAZING banjo picker and I really really want to see him when he comes here in June…. Who’s with me??

Monday, April 26, 2010

MORE great tunes!

AH!!!! MORE great tunes!
http://www.myspace.com/gregoryalanisakov

I love music.
Speaking of which, my man Jason Gray is currently #4 on the A/C Indicators Charts... BUT KLOVE finally added him, so he could very well be #1 by next week!!! How awesome is that??? Plus there's a rumor of a HUGE tour for him this fall... Good things for a great guy! He has certainly earned it!

OK back to homework- inter-testimonial Hellenistic Philosophies here I come!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

confirmed.

Well today 36 lil'uns were welcomed into membership though Confirmation. Good times were had by all. Its seeing 36 kiddos in front of my when my calling becomes all the more clear. Synod-wide, the average church would have 10-12 of them end up being active members. Our church's averages would have 12-14 be active. The thought that even one of them will essentially deny the existence of God by the next decade is heartbreaking, but to know that stats would say that 6 or 7 of them will... man. Out of my little confirmation class of 12 back in 1994, I'm not sure how many are still connected to a church. There are 3 or 4 that I keep in loose contact with and none of them are active... people ask me often what the answer is, how can we retain our youth? If I knew I'd be rich. But I don't really know. I know parenting is huge, as is someone taking a vested interest in their lives and modeling a positive faith life. I wish I could be that guy in everyone's life, but I simply am not… which parents, of course, let me know all the time. Lovely creatures, parents are…
It really is on days like this that my whole job existence is put into question... You can't help but wonder what good it is to minister to youth when the majority of the application of faith isn’t until they’re beyond youthfulness… The fact is, there are plenty of youth group kids who are in Hell (to put it bluntly…) so why am I on the payroll? I mean the seemingly randomness of everything can just make your head spin. I think that if I had to articulate the one thing that would make me doubt God’s benevolence it would be the randomness of it all. I mean who remains faithful and who doesn’t… and the background of them all… I mean I know guys who had great parents and solid Christian up-bringing and now they are committed atheists…and then those from broken-no-good families with tons of things to be “angry at God” about and they are as devout as can be… where is there rhyme or reason to any of it? And people who have been in Christian schools since kindergarten, only to reject Biblical truth??
And what of Proverbs 22:6? “Train up a child in the way he should go, so even when he is old he will not depart from it.” What does that mean? What of those who departed from it? Were they not properly trained?
I know these things are not for me to understand, and they are honestly not stumbling blocks, just unanswered questions. But, thankfully, unanswered questions only turn me with more intensity to THE Answer and as I rest in His hands I know that He is indeed bigger, wiser, and greater than I… which is the greatest comfort of all. So now I let God be God and I’ll just work on being His little child.
Regardless, keep the 36 Confirmed in your prayers that they will indeed always seek the Lord in all their thoughts, words, and actions, and they would remain faithful to the True Faith until Life Everlasting.
In a lighter twist of irony… at my third open house today I told the story of how I don’t have a party story… it was awesome. :)

Saturday, April 24, 2010

maple syrup farming conglomerate...

Well i'm not playing cards right now because someone (once again) neglected to abide by the Code and we were left with 3... oh well, what can ya do?

It's party season which is awesome. Confirmation weekend is action packed and graduation season is right around the corner. The only thing is, though, I don't have a party story!
2 years ago my party story was how I bought a boat. Last year the story was how I was about to take 9 kids into the Boundary Waters for a week and hopefully make it out alive... this year I don't have a story. Our Utah trip was cancelled because of the lamitude of the seniors... and really while the summer is busy, its not terribly interesting... i've been quite consumed with school lately- not only is that a boring topic, it is also a potential powderkeg, so I avoid talking about it if at all possible... so yeah, I am without a party story which is vexing because I have a LOT of parties to attend.
You see, I need a story to keep the conversation going. I fear few things more than awkward silence, so when entering into social situations I honestly go over talking points in my head as to have ammunition when the small talk ceases. Hence, the party story. Today i was at a confirmation and I started discussing the migration patterns of Codfish in the 15th century. for real. that's what happens when i don't have a party story.

MAN i need to get thinking...
ummmm upcoming movies? no, lame...
ummm new girlfriend?
*cricket*
*cricket*
...ummm interesting books I've read lately... not bad. I'll make it a 3rd or 4th topic.
the Twins?? yes!
the Vikings draft??? Bing again!
but what if i'm talking to out of towners or non-sportsical types?
gahh! this is too complicated.

Maybe fish migration ain't such a bad idea...
I'll keep you posted.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Three from Henry Nouwen

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”

“For as long as you can remember, you have been a pleaser, depending on others to give you an identity. You need not look at that only in a negative way. You wanted to give your heart to others, and you did so quickly and easily. But now you are being asked to let go of all these self-made props and trust that God is enough for you. You must stop being a pleaser and reclaim your identity as a free self.”

“When we become aware that we do not have to escape our pains, but that we can mobilize them into a common search for life, those very pains are transformed from expressions of despair into signs of hope”

Thursday, April 22, 2010

BeNo.

Tomorrow Bebo Norman is playing Bethel and I'm not going. For the first time in 8 years I am not going to see Bebo on his MPLS stop... I could go... probably get on the guest list... but I'm not going to. True I have something MUCH better to do with people who are VERY cool, but there's more to my not attending.
You see, my freshman year of college my roommate Wade introduced me to Bebo’s music. 10,000 Days rocked my face off. I immediately became a fan. His music was easily approachable, but very poignant. The album was masterfully made- as if each song introduced the next. Never has any single artist connected with me like Bebo did- and it just kept on getting better. I bought his self-release Fabric of Verse and fell in love with that. Then Me, Myself and Big Blue Sky and Try… Song after song touched me right in the center of my heart as if I was living the words he was singing. I know that may sound weird, but really to be able to connect an emotion or feeling with a song is a powerful thing- but to do it over and over again… indescribable.
Then I started going to his shows. The first one was in a rehearsal hall at Luther College there were maybe 50 people there. He played and played and it was magic.
Then my dad and I went to a show at St. Thomas. It was a full room- maybe 200 people. He played for a solid 2 hours. It was lights out. Then he started selling out Maranatha Hall at Northwestern and Grace Church in EP. I saw him 3 times in one year. First 4 rows every time. (I am NOT a stalker, I promise) He told the same 3 or 4 stories every show, but that was OK because they were always funny and I always laughed. Plus he always had his guy Gabe Scott with him- a man who can play EVERYTHING... honestly, bebo shows are pretty fantastic.
But then it all changed. His music started to be a little more dissident- not literally, but emotionally. His stories were different too… and he was touring less…and putting out fewer singles… what happened? Why the change? You guessed it… he got married.
She.
Ruined.
Everything.
Ever since then I have not at all been impressed with his tunes. Not only are the words bland and shallow, but he’s gone WAY more “poppy” in style. And now he’s on BEC records… a BIG corporate label… blagh.
So tomorrow I’m not going to see him. Alas, I still love his old music- When people ask me who my favorite musician is, I always say “Bebo”… and I always will. For 8 years he connected with me in a way that was unprecidented and likely unrepeatable. I can only hope that as his massive CCM popularly eventually inevitably dwindles, he’ll return to his roots of a southern singer/songwriter who makes music as a musician lead by his heart, not by his label…

The Hammer Holds
Bebo Norman, The Fabric of Verse
A shapeless piece of steel,
That's all I claim to be
This hammer pounds to give me form,
This flame, it melts my dreams

I glow with fire and fury,
As I'm twisted like a vine
My final shape, my final form
I'm sure I'm bound to find

So dream a little, dream for me
In hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me
So I can bear the flames
And hurt a little, hurt for me
My future is untold
But my dreams are not the issue here,
For they, the hammer holds

And the water, it cools me gray,
And the hurt's subdued somehow
I have my shape, this sharpened point,
What is my purpose now?

And the question still remains,
What am I to be?
Perhaps some perfect piece of art
Displayed for all to see

So dream a little, dream for me
In hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me
So I can bear the flames
And hurt a little, hurt for me
My future is untold
But my dreams are not the issue here,
For they, the hammer holds

The hammer pounds again,
But flames I do not feel
This force that drives me, helplessly,
Through flesh, and wood reveals
A burn that burns much deeper,
It's more than I can stand
The reason for my life was to take
The life of a guiltless man

So dream a little, dream for me
In hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me
So I can bear the pain
And hurt a little, hurt for me,
My future is so bold
But my dreams are not the issue here,
For they, the hammer holds

This task before me may seem unclear
But it, my maker holds

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

on the occasion of king carl's 62nd birthday... or is it 63?

It was my pop's birthday on Monday, so I thought I'd put down some thoughts about dads...
Few words in the English language will conjure more emotions, thoughts, perceptions than the word “Father” or “dad” or “daddy”
As you just read those words your mind immediately jumped to a picture-
Something comes immediately and powerfully comes to mind when I say the word “Father” perhaps when I say the word “daddy” a different variation comes to mind, but the powerful picture remains.
What comes to mind?
Do your thoughts first turn to the media?
To what our culture has made fathers into-
Maybe Danny on Full House or Homer Simpson, or Peter Griffen?
Or do you think of your own dad-
Good or bad-
I mean one might be thinking of the good times that dad brings, the other thinks of hurt and heartache.
Some might be thinking, which one? You have a step dad or an adopted dad or no father figure at all…

Few other words have such power.

I tell you what I think-
I think of my dad, Carl. He’s a pastor
He can fix anything
His work bench is filled with all sorts of odd and ends and gadgets that used to fascinate me as a kid, and still do today.
He loves to buy stuff off Ebay or craigslist that’s broken and fix it- which makes for great Christmas gifts…
He’s a mechanic, I can think of at LEAST 50 cars that my dad has bought and sold in the last 20 years.
He’s quirky, he’s kind, he’s gentle, he’s my dad-
He went from man to immortal in my mind on a vacation we took back in ’86…
We were in Glacier National Park, and if you’ve ever been to a National Park, you know that the hope, prayer, and desire of every bloomin’ person in the park is to see wild animals. The wilder the better. A Elk is good, a bison better, a moose great, a bear… legendary. We, obviously, wanted to see a bear. Its kind of a game as you weave in and out of mountain passes to spot wildlife. Your eyes are always peeled for things that can kill you so you can get out and get close to it and take a picture… genius.
Well, as soon as someone spots something that moves and appears to be large the whole world seemingly comes to a stand-still as people turn the already small roads into parking lots so they can get their own crappy picture of some sort of hoofed or clawed animal that’s more than likely 200 yards away. Trust me, after working in Yellowstone for a summer, do yourself a favor and buy a postcard instead…
ANYWAY, we had our hearts set on seeing a bear so when we came upon a BIG traffic jam we got really excited. Everyone was piled up on one end of a horseshoe-shaped scenic overlook. We assumed the bear was in the middle, so being smart and savvy outdoors people, we decided to go to the opposite end of where all the people were congregating and get niiiice and close to what we hoped was a merciless salmon killer. My mom, was unenthused, so she stayed in the big brown van with an orange stripe and no air conditioning that we called home for the 2 week trek out west.

So it was me and my dad and my 3 siblings out to get the world’s best picture. We come around this bend and we stop in our tracks. Half disappointed we find ourselves 20 feet or so away from a big ole mama moose. It was just standing in the path not too concerned with the growing crowd in front of her. Unfortunately for us, we were behind her. Now here is where the actual details get a little fuzzy. I was like 7 years old so I can’t say these are the exact events that transpired that sunny summer’s day in Montana, but this is the way I tell the story…We were admiring the rear quarters of the moose when she turned around and started slowly walking toward us. It was at that point we heard a rustling in the bushes to our right. We all look as a little baby moose emerges from the brush. Now I’m no Jack Hannah, but it is NEVER good to come between a mommy and her baby… By the time we realized what was going on, it seems the mom figured it out too… so she started to grunt and hoof at the ground. In one foul swoop she lunges toward us charging us as ramming speed. It was in this moment that my father channeled his inner Jackie Chan. He was in the middle of the pack until he jumped through us facing the moose one-on-one knees bent eyes wide open, arms fully stretched as he yelled, ‘RUN KIDS!”
We booked it as fast as we could. We bolted to the van got in as my mom yelled. “LOCK THE DOORS!” … like the moose could get in or something… we all plaster our faces to the windows to see my dad sprint out of the woods and into the safety of the van. The moose did not follow.
Yep, my dad is a superhero. He saved us from the evil charge of a ticked off mama moose. That’s love. Of course it is a funny story and its one of my favorite to tell- you can be sure I embellish a little… But the fact is, my dad didn’t think about it- he threw himself in front of us kids… Moose are indeed big, heavy, violent creatures- given the right circumstances, he could have died… but he was willing to do that for us. That’s a pretty cool realization, and that’s a really neat picture of love: throwing yourself in front of a moose.

But, that’s my dad, and it’s easy for me to take the good things about my father and plug them into how I picture my father in Heaven.
My dad here on earth provides- my father in heaven provides-
My dad on earth is loving, my father in heaven is loving…
Many of us have a wonderful model of how the Lord intended the family- and can picture God the father every time they look into the eyes of their dad on earth-

But, before I go too far, I know there are tons of people out there saying hey man, you got it good- my dad sucks. He’s an alcoholic, or he’s mentally or physically abusive, my dad left before I was born…

For every dad that’s there there’s a dad who’s not.
And that saddens me, it truly does-
If you want to read a REALLY REALLY good book on this very topic, read, “To Own A Dragon” by Donald Miller. OUTSTANDING book!
Anyway, the AMAZING thing is this- Regardless of your fathers here on earth. Regardless of what comes to mind initially when you hear the word “Father” despite any pain or heartache your dad has caused-
We have a Father-God in Heaven who loves us unconditionally through Jesus.

Phil. 4:19- And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus

Psalm 145:15-16
The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time
You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing

Just as my dad was willing to give up his life for us kids-
God became man in the person of Christ Jesus and died on the cross for you and for me.
He didn’t turn and yell RUN KIDS-
But rather he opens his arms and says COME to me all you who are weak and heavy burdened and I will give you rest!
He says call upon me in the day of trouble- I will deliver you!

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!
We went from enemies of God because of sin. To His dearly loved children through Christ. Thanks be to God!
He daily provides for us by giving us food in our stomachs and clothes on our backs- we have LIFE thru him-
He created us!!! And not like some sort of robot mass producing the same product over and over, but rather he made us all unique and different
The Psalmist says he Knit us together in our mothers wombs.
He knows us by name
He knows the number of hairs on our heads-
Just as he provides for the birds of the air- do you ever see a robin look nervous cuz he can’t find a worm?
Of course not- just as he provides for the birds, he provides for us!

No matter how great or how bad our dads on earth are- know that our daddy in heaven- Abba, father, our creator- He is good, he is faithful, he is pure, and we are his dearly loved kids sitting safely in his arms.
Don’t let the darkness of this world cloud your vision of your father in heaven.

Being a German, I'm not one to say "I love you" to my 'rents... but they know I do... regardless of how I do it, I know that it's really let them know that I do indeed love them so much-
Because our father in heaven let us know that he loves us by sending by save us from sin-
By giving us a hope and a future-
Not just in this world, but in the world to come
Because of the love that our father has showed us thru Christ Jesus
We have his grace and his peace that will dwell in us forever-
In his arms we rest and in his name we live.

Its later... so, good night, world!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

yes i'm back, tell a friend

I’m BACK! Whew! It has been a ca-raazy several days!
School is in finals mode- so big tests and papers loom… The Jefferson Connection were competing in a national show choir competition, so naturally I went with them to the Show Me State, and a 15 page paper on Eckhart Tolle’s heresy was due Monday… That is a prescription for a ton of driving, not a lot of sleeping, too much glitter, great tunes sung by not-so-great choirs, copious cheering and yelling, and face muscles that ache from smiling so much. I love my job.
Sadly, the fallout is me not giving this bl(a)gh any attention. But now the competition is on. I have no choice but to post in a meaningful way each and every day. Lucky You. …I’ll start tomorrow… :)

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Branson Bound

WOW! Good times with the old folks today. Nothing like a road trip, BBQ eating, and casino walking with a bunch of parents to get you giddy with summer joy! Seriously, these people are awesome. its gonna be a good weekend in Branson!

battery....... dying......... n

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

I just finished reading my 2nd book in as many months... and it's the first novel i've ever read - "Crazy Heart"... not too shabby... on to the next one...

Monday, April 12, 2010

right on target...

Today was the first game in the new Target Field. I cannot contain my excitement. I’m a little bit of a baseball fan… OK I’m a big baseball fan! We went to a lot of games when I was a kid- we’d get “knothole tickets” from SA… I think they were free for kids or something like that. We would get a bunch of free stuff- color your own Twins postcards, Kirby Puckett Silver Slugger bats (that we foolishly used and broke…) and countless Twins hats from DQ. Lots of good times in good ole days up in the cheap seats of the Dome when the Twins were electric. Once we sat front row over the Twin’s dugout and my dad had us tie pens and paper to string and lower it down in front of the dugout in hopes of getting an autograph. Unless I imagined that… I’m not sure… Anyway as a kid we had a lot of fun at Twins games. I remember the Star Wars theme playing after every homerun. I get chills thinking about it…
But then 1994 came and the Twins started to suck -really really badly. My buddies and I went to a couple of games in high school, but they were definitely not top of the list. We’d go to see other teams play. But I remember vividly the day I got back into the game. My brother got tickets for my dad and me and we went to a game vs. the Royals. Guys like Jacque Jones, Corey Koskie and Torii Hunter were just starting out and people started to notice that the Twins were interesting again. I don’t remember what happened at the game, but it was a great night with my brother and dad- we had the super big ridiculous jumbo hot dogs that made us all sick… good times. From that point on I was again addicted and have been ever since.
I won’t bore you with more Twins memories, but I do indeed love the game and I love the Twins very much, and I’m super pumped that we have one of the best facilities in the game. It’s going to be a fun year- rainouts and all!

hundo!

hmmm post # 100... better make it good, I guess! I was eating lunch with my normal crew of old people and professors and Andy O the graphic design guru and all around super smart guy brought up something that has been bouncing around in my brain… Right now Bethany is putting on a play that has to do with the Holocaust. After the performance they have a Q&A with a survivor of Auschwitz. I guess it’s made for some pretty amazing conversation. After Sunday’s show, however she was asked if she identifies or feels akin to other peoples who have been victims of genocide- like those in Rwanda or Cambodia and the such… Her answer was a bit shocking. She said something to the effect of she has been wrestling with the idea of the morality of outside forces invading other countries even if they are “liberating” them. She said that those who aren’t in the situation don’t fully know the situation and maybe its just the universe’s way of maintaining equilibrium and population control isn’t necessarily a bad thing… I’m summarizing, of course, but that was the gist.
How crazy is that?? Of all people who would understand the idea of righteous war and the notion of a liberation force- certainly a holocaust survivor… right? It really makes me tremble when we can’t even agree that murder is a negative thing that shouldn’t be tolerated. I mean genocide is an acceptable form of population control? Says on who was going to be eradicated by a crazed dictator? Nutzo. Post-Modernism and it’s relative truth is scary. There are so many reasons why I don’t envy my jr high, sr high and college kids. They have to deal with so much more crap (for lack of a better term) than I ever had to- social pressures and academic worries and financial burdens… but philosophically, they have to deal with this lack of any absolutes for their entire lives, and it just makes my heart sad. If we had a 30% confirmation rate in my generation- without a 3 minute news cycle and cyber-bullying… what is this generation going to be like when they’re being bombarded with moral relativism and a co-exist-acceptance doctrine. Yikes. Lord quickly come!
...kind of a downer of a post for #100... i'll make 101 extra happy... :)

Sunday, April 11, 2010

good things

today i did the kiddy message and served communion with my fly down... thankfully no one noticed, i think... oops.
also i caught some rays while not catching softballs... hung out with some super cool high schoolers and rocked out with their parents after. not a shabby sunday.
my wrist, however, hurts rullll bad... more ice... more advil...
good things!

woah.

This is scary...
While it is good to know that I am a "normal" youth minister... it's scary that they wrote a song that so clearly describes me... at least #1-3... and #4 isn't too far off I suppose...
anyway... enjoy!

Saturday, April 10, 2010

I'm pulling for Tiger... is that ok?

Thursday, April 8, 2010

CW #355

This one is from the archives...

Take the world, but give me Jesus,
All its joys are but a name;
But His love abideth ever,
Through eternal years the same.

Oh, the height and depth of mercy!
Oh, the length and breadth of love!
Oh, the fullness of redemption,
Pledge of endless life above!

Take the world, but give me Jesus,
Sweetest comfort of my soul;
With my Savior watching o’er me,
I can sing though billows roll.

Oh, the height and depth of mercy!
Oh, the length and breadth of love!
Oh, the fullness of redemption,
Pledge of endless life above!

Take the world, but give me Jesus,
Let me view His constant smile;
Then throughout my pilgrim journey
Light will cheer me all the while.

Oh, the height and depth of mercy!
Oh, the length and breadth of love!
Oh, the fullness of redemption,
Pledge of endless life above!

Take the world, but give me Jesus.
In His cross my trust shall be,
Till, with clearer, brighter vision,
Face to face my Lord I see.

Oh, the height and depth of mercy!
Oh, the length and breadth of love!
Oh, the fullness of redemption,
Pledge of endless life above!

"If I had a choice, I would still choose to re­main blind… for when I die, the first face I will ev­er see will be the face of my bless­ed Sav­ior."
-Fanny Crosby

I must admit this hymn is one of my favorites. Many a sad and lonely time has been traversed with this hymn in my heart. We can praise God in the midst of trial, we can see the blood of Jesus washing our sins away- and with this wonderful hymn we put it all in perspective. Take the world, but give me Jesus!
A women of faith by the name of Fanny Crosby wrote this hymn in 1800’s New York. In May of 1820, when she was six weeks old, she caught a cold, and her eyes became slightly inflamed. The regular physician in Putnam County, New York, was out of town, and a man posing as a doctor gave her the wrong treatment. Within days, her eyesight was destroyed, and the man fled town in a panic.
Fanny was never bitter about the stranger's intervention. "I have not for a moment in more than eighty-five years felt a spark of resentment against him, because I have always believed...that the good Lord...by this means consecrated me to the work that I am still permitted to do."
She spent her childhood in the New York school for the blind she was a tremendously talented student. She spent her adult years teaching and lobbying in Washington DC for the blind. She lived to be 95 years old. In her life she composed over 7000 hymns and she was friend to 8 presidents!

She was truly an amazing woman of faith. She had modest fame and acquired quite a fortune, but she never lost sight of the one who gave her the fame
She never forgot the most important fortune- the crown of life waiting for us in heaven

The words she wrote almost 150 years ago are still so very relevant to us today. Never in our history has so much stuff been available to so many people-
TV’s, cars, shoes... you name it and you can get it- it’s no longer just the rich and famous living rich and famous lifestyles.
Satan is dancing ‘round this world as our greed and materialism increases.
But what REALLY matters?
Jesus died on the cross.
He took away our sins.
He rose again.
He conquored once and for all sin, death and the devil.
He came to this earth, lived a perfect life suffered a criminal’s death and died
So that we don’t have to!!!!

Of course, He wants us to live a long life on the earth, He wants us to enjoy our time here. After all, He gave us a beautiful creation to enjoy and so many friends and family to make memories with...
It is not our duty to count down the days until our end nor sit around and wait to die, rather it’s our charge to tell everyone about the saving truths of the gospel!
Regardless,There is nothing here on this earth we can take with us.
It is our privilege as redeemed children of God to live in the world but not get caught up in the world. It is our honor to share the good news of Jesus’ death
We can say with full assurance that this world is not all there is!And someday, when He calls us home, we know we will be welcomed with His loving arms
"Oh the height and depth of mercy, oh the length and breath of love oh the FULLNESS of redemption pledge of endless life above!"
May these words be forever on our hearts.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

as a doornail...

Last night I watched the outstanding HBO movie “Taking Chance”. I highly recommend it! It really is fantastic. It stars Kevin Bacon and is the true story of a Marine escorting a fallen soldier’s body back home to be buried. Very well done. Rent it today.

Anyway, something from the movie stuck with me. They show a scene of the mortuary people cleaning and prepping the body- and they show a close up of them removing the deceased man’s watch. The watch was still running even though the wearer had been dead for days. For some reason that idea touched me. There are few things more useless than a watch to a dead man. No longer does he need to be on time, no more will promptness and tardiness be his concern; yet his wrist watch dutifully continues on in its task of counting every single second day after day. I don’t know what about that picture gets me, but something does. Maybe I’m tempted to say it proves that everything is meaningless- we’re only going to die someday… who cares if I’m late to a meeting or drop out of school, right? Or maybe I’m tempted to travel a bit lighter- worry less about the stuff that I have and acquire, and focus more on the intangibles of life- relationships, and sharing the hope that I have in Jesus… or maybe I’m tempted to savor every moment that I live- be consciously aware of every second that I’m alive and make the most of them because I’m only going to have so many… I don’t really know what it makes me think… I just know there’s something deep in that image…

Today I went to only my second chapel service all semester. It was fantastic. Chaplain Don told the story of the mega-rich drug dealer who made sure that no expense was spared at his funeral. He had a casket made of glass and had a horse procession pull him through the neighborhood on his way to his internment. It was a tremendous spectacle. A local news affiliate covered the story and asked an elderly neighbor what she thought of the gilded parade, and she simply answered, “Well, he’s still dead.” It’s so true. He had the best funeral money could buy- people are still talking about it today, but he’s still dead. Thanks be to God that the same cannot be said of our Savior from sin. His funeral was discrete and fogged in confusion, but it doesn’t matter because he didn’t stay in the tomb very long….

How those two thoughts- a watch that ticks away while the one who wears it lays dead, and an expensive funeral cannot change the fact that the deceased is still deceased- how they fit together, I do not know… but I thought it was at least a little odd that I came across those two thoughts within 20 hours of each other… so I just thought I would share them with you… can you draw some parallels?

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Well this is my first text bla(h)g posting. I'm hoping this will make it easier for me to keep up and complete my daily posting challenge. yay for technology!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Poetry Gem #1

Well, I was cleaning out my car today and I found these two gems in between my seats. They had been in a notebook that I used for a chapel a couple months ago and must have fallen out. I was a very emotional high schooler and these poems show that.
HA!
I hope you get as good of a laugh out of them as I do... What can I say? love makes a boy go crazy... :)
enojy!
Reflections of the Night
2-17-1999

The darkness turns cold
Away from the fold
Afraid and alone
My life postponed
I tried and got burned

What did I intend?
A life long friend?
My hopes and dreams seem dumb
I shiver in the void
Distraught and annoyed
My toes and fingers are numb.

Who did I think?
I was on the brink
Of the most amazing alive
My stomach, it sinks
My cheeks turn pink
“Only the strong survive”

My heart is torn
A pierce from the thorn
Of the most wonderful rose I know
So here I stand
Like no one else can
Alone in the darkness and snow.

Poetry Gem #2

I had some meter issues... that's apparent. Also, the words "alas" and "plight" should be included in every poem, they just make it classy.

A Stupid Poem
March, 1999

Our Paths have split
This is the end
With a heavy heart I leave you, my friend
With a tear in my eye
I say good-bye
“I promised myself I wouldn’t cry”

You were my life, my all
Compared to you I feel so small
I’d give you anything
I’d buy you the world
If you’d be my woman, my beautiful girl

You say we’re friends, it wouldn’t be right
As I fall down; dead in my plight
Why can’t you see you’re the one for me?
My love extends as far as the seas!

Alas, I resign,
I say that I’m fine
Our friendship we impart
I’m ill from a broken heart

But soon it will heal
At least you know how I feel
Without a relationship
But with a friend…
But is this really they end

Saturday, April 3, 2010

never let go...

Until a couple of months ago the top grossing film of all time was “Titanic”. Does that strike you odd? I mean of all the movies that have been made in the past 75 years “Titanic” is the one in which we ALL know the ending. The ship sinks. Everyone knows that. And yet a gajillion people spent like a billion dollars going to see it? How does that make any sense?
I was thinking about this yesterday as I was heading out to Tenebrae. Quite honestly I’m really not “into” Lent this year… I don’t know why, but my heart isn’t overtaken with grief and emotionally I’m rather stable. In fact I found myself a little bored. “I know how it ends”, I mentioned to people sitting next to me noticing my lethargic attitude. I do know how the story of Jesus’ Passion ends. He dies and rises again. And because of that I too will die and rise. That is awesome! That is a spectacle to behold! I think working at a church sometimes depletes the emotional side of my faith. I go to church not to hear the Word and receive the sacrament, but rather to sing and preach and make sure the microphones are on… it kind of sterilizes the experiential aspect of a relationship with Jesus. It doesn’t mean that I believe any less, nor does it imply that I am any less taken aback by the unfathomable love it took to put my Savior on the cross; it just means that in this particular Lenten season I’m a little more cerebral than I am emotional.
“Titanic” made all that money because people loved the love story and sacrifice that it put on the screen. I think that is why our churches are packed on Good Friday and Easter. We are in awe of Jesus’ love and are truly amazed at the sacrifice that He made on the tree. Unlike “Titanic”, however, we know that the ending is happy. In mere hours I get to help bring in the Easter joy to the good folks of BLC. While the sleep is still in many of our eyes, we sit with them wide-open at the empty tomb, just trying to comprehend the amazing victory over sin, death, and hell that the risen Jesus brings. We might get a little tired of the motions that our human ceremonies and traditions bring, but may God grant us a child-like faith when it comes to knowing that our salvation was made sure when Christ rolled away that stone. May that fact never become stale or old, may it always be as sweet as the candy we put in our baskets to celebrate this wonderful holiday.

Friday, April 2, 2010

How Deep...

How deep the Father’s love for us
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the Chosen One
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon the cross
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed to hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that kept Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Brokering's Prayer


Children of God, dying and rising,
Sing to the Lord a new song!
Heaven and earth, hosts everlasting,
Sing to the Lord a new song!
He has done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song.
(CW#247)

Herbert Brokering, hymn-writer, book author, and Luther scholar now stands in joy beside his Savior. He is remembered as one who was alive in Jesus, alive to God’s people, and one who delighted in all of God’s creation, seen or unseen. He had a passion for words and often gave single words as baptismal presents to children. He connected words with the Word becoming flesh and fresh in Jesus. His writing evoked a childlike joy and faith in Jesus and all he has done.

Brokering’s prayer for each of us:

Lord, send me a surprise. One that catches me off guard and makes me wonder…like Easter.
Send me a resurrection when everything looks dead and buried.
Send me light when night seems too long.
Send me spring when the cold and frozen season seems endless.
Send me an idea when my mind is empty.
Send me a thing to do when I am just waiting around.
Send me a new friend when I am alone.
Send me peace when I am afraid.
Send me a future when it looks hopeless.
Send me your Resurrection when I die, Jesus!

wow!

This is the most insane (pun intended) thing I’ve read in a long time…
FACINATING!

http://tinyurl.com/deep001

April 1st Day

Man I don't know how April Fools Day existed before the interwebs did... there are so many funny things online today, I really won't get any work done...
I did come across this... I assume it's a serious post, but I guess you never know today... I hope it's real, and I gotta give Neal some props! Way to have morals, man! Check the article out here: http://tinyurl.com/ygcm488

And for the interweb's best pranks... http://www.pcworld.com/article/193113/top_10_april_fools_day_fake_news_items_for_2010.html

too funny.